Wednesday, August 29, 2012

PicNPay Highway


What I am about to tell you may not seem like an ‘epiphany’ to some readers but the I checked the dictionary definition and it stated the word as “A moment of sudden understanding or revelation”, and for me this was one of those moments. I was walking down to the local store from my place when I began to notice what most guys notice during the onset of spring, SHORT EVERYTHING. I remember stating a week earlier on my blackberry messenger status that the time had come to start walking looking down. I was feeling particularly vulnerable at this moment, could have a been a failed attempt to finish a scholarship essay due this Friday, or fatigue from a whole day workshop on clinical trials. Whatever the reason I felt the temptation to look a little bit longer or maybe just a second glance. In that moment I felt something in me say, “It may look appetising now, but in the end you get used to everything.” This sentence puzzled me as I walked into the store and looked for items that I needed to purchase. I started thinking of the implications of that statement, if I were to date a young lady, no matter how hot she looks I would get used to it ? I don’t know about you but this was a frightening realisation for me, I felt a bit like Solomon in Ecclesiastes 2 where he states his multiple pleasures of life and ends the chapter with these words “....This makes no more sense than chasing the wind.” (CEV)

I began thinking of the classical male view of male:female struggles, which I myself had supported vehemently many a time. Simply this view states that, female problems with immorality are emotional and male problems are physical. Though there are merits to this view, highlighting the visible elements of male and female sexual immorality struggles, it takes away from the male experience the issue of the heart and degrades it to hormonal triggers and erections. To get back to my story, I managed to buy what I needed from the store, as I walked back that’s when the epiphanic phrase hit me “NOTHING ELSE SATISFIES BUT YOU”. For most people who believe in Jesus, these words have been sung in songs and preached in sermons. There really is nothing epiphanic or radical about the phrase, or so I used to think. Let me help you get into my head a little bit, think of the thing you love the most or are most fond of, resist the temptation to quickly say “Jesus” if you are a Christian. That thing that popped into your head, will never satisfy. It could be music, I love music so much,, spend an hour with me and I will mention something music related. But I realised I can have every Christian album ever written and at the end of the day, that part of me that seeks contentment will not be filled. Maybe you are a guy and having the hottest girl really makes you feel awesome. At some point that girl will not look as hott as she did, not cause she has aged, but just cause she is no longer new. Then you will go to the next one and she’s hot for a while but then she loses her zing again. And you keep changing from one girl to the next, the only thing that changes are the girls and never aching desire for contentment.

So I thought to myself on that walk back that for a long time I had been avoiding looking at scantly dressed women (which is a good practice and advise all guys to do), but all that had changed was that I didn’t look at scantly dressed women, my heart was still the same, longing for whatever most satisfies. So I seek to encourage all my brothers out there who are like me, to see our desires not through the primitive lens of just a physical appetite, but more an appetite of our heart. I also encourage those who haven’t met Jesus yet, and have felt like I did today that all my endeavours without Him being the main source of satisfaction where like chasing the wind, to seek Him now and have your hearts longings be satisfied

Love, peace and happiness

Tau 

Monday, July 23, 2012

Lone Rangers are Dead Rangers

Wow am looking at the last time I wrote anything at all, as my brother would says "It's been yonks". I will try by all means to make up for lost time and give you all an update of what has been happening in the past month.

So I started my experimental work in the laboratory on the 16th of June and it has been a month filled with 6+hours of lab time a day and walking into an empty apartment as my roommate was away for 3weeks during the winter-break. I still remember feeling very angry and dejected one day when I just had so much work to do and it seemed so fruitless as I am working on the beginning stages of drug research. So it includes repeated experiments for 5days a week for 8-10weeks and this was not at all what I signed up for. Feeling as if in my mind my 1st year of research would be filled with exciting new compounds and results would be popping up randomly of groundbreaking research. But I guess it was a learning curve for me that things really do take time and its in the ditches and the valleys of life where we learn stuff. Its in the darkness that the greatest photographs are developed. So that's just a snippet of the past couple of weeks of my life, just want to encourage you all that you may be in that place where you feel what you are doing does not seem to producing anything. Just be encouraged that your effort does not go unseen and most times a work is being done in us than around us.

So back to the reason for this blog, I remember chatting to my best friend yesterday and telling her how I needed a new pair of jeans and would have to find a way to budget for me.She looked at me perplexed and asked why I just wouldn't ask my mom to buy me a pair since she would be around for the whole week. I looked at her and told her how I was on the cusp of  24 and I couldn't be relying on my parents to buy me clothes. It then struck me this morning how it had become hard and near impossible to ask my parents for money. I feel a sense of there is an expectation more from myself than anyone else to take care of myself. That it's a sign of maturity to not be dependent on anyone for anything especially my parents. I wonder if that's how we behave with God and the family (the church) God has provided for us. It's seems like such a cultural expectation that being a Lone Ranger is a sign of maturity, especially for guys moving out is what we think about the most once we have hit the ripe age of 18. But is it biblical though? Do we feel the need to be okay all on our own even in our christian lives. Is it maturity not to depend on your family and see things through on your own. When we have troubles in our christian walk do we steer away from counsel and family(the church) security and want to make it all on our own. I think the bible makes in clear in so many cases of great men and women of God and how they were always in community. It speaks of David's mighty men and how they had many exploits, how David slayed his ten's of thousands but interestingly enough it was always him and his mighty men. I think the clearest verse for me that shows the sense of togetherness that is required for true christian maturity is Hebrews 12:1-3:


Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

If Lone Rangers were the way to go then I think the writer of Hebrews would have used the words "Since you are surrounded... and ... you should run with...." But the emphasis on 'let us' in this verse is unmistakable. So I just want to encourage us all to not have a world view but a biblical view of maturity which is one that does not make us lose our independence but allows us to embrace and realise our need for interdependence. 

So I guess am guess I am getting those jeans after all... :)

Love, peace and happiness

Tau 

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Its Joy!


What really makes worship, worship? Its a question I have been asking myself recently. I guess I had found many ways to worship and different tactics had worked for different congregation settings. But I was stumped at me was what lay at the core of true worship.

Last week I lost a good friend of mine to leukaemia. It came as a shock to me, I had seen him two months prior and he was in good spirits. I remember him telling me about how great stuff is happening with a small group at his house and how they are expanding and planting out. I was so excited for him, he had barely been out of the hospital a few days from chemo and he was upbeat. I remember him telling me that his body had stopped responding to treatment but with a smile on his face he said he trusted God. Truly his joy was evident, it allowed him to worship God.

So it hit me that one of the fundamental pillars of worship is joy. Joy allows us to really see God for me the definition of joy is a satisfaction in God. Just thinking that we all find ourselves in times that are tough. It may be trying to make the most of our study time in University and our loved ones are not loving us the way we want them to. How then do we continue to be unseen worshippers? How do we honour and praise God in these tough times? I say by being joyful, finding joy in unhappiness means being satisfied in who God is, and trusting Him, not that he will change the situation but because He is trustworthy.
Isn't good to have amazing people in life who remind you of just how joyful we can be in Christ. I wrote all the stuff above a few days ago but hadn't quite found a peace of scripture that went with my thoughts on that night. I read again a post today by Kate Andre that she wrote a while ago http://kateandre.com/2011/10/17/thankful-for-you-love/(definitely worth a read) and someone commented and gave this verse: Psalm 4:8-9

You have put more joy in my heart
than they have when their grain and new wine abound. 
I will both lie down and sleep in peace, 
for You alone, Lord, make me live in safety(HCSB)

The sovereignty of our King, Jesus is amazing. I wonder how anyone can sleep at night not knowing that there is someone much bigger looking out for them.
I will end this off this post with a one sentence eulogy for my friend Felix Chidembo: "He was a man that found his joy in Jesus until his last breath"

Love, peace and happiness

Tau

Thursday, April 26, 2012

The Open Secret...




So today I had a meeting with one of my coordinators for the program I am a part of and it was quite a helpful chat. I went in there all guns blazing ready for her to make right the problems in our cohort. Funny enough the fact and words that came from here were true, that its up to me. I needed to be able to share these things to articulate these problems for the whole cohort to get past it. It wasn't about pointing fingers or pushing blame it really was about being light.

I found that such a helpful metaphor and it stuck with me the whole day as I chatted to my brother on skype. He was letting me in on the state of affairs of the company he is currently working for. How mismanagement and corruption had seeped into the very core of the leadership which resulted in the company being run down. I immediately got reminded of a verse that may be used for a conference we are having called 'The Open Secret'. Its The Message bible version of Mark 4:21-22:

Jesus went on: "Does anyone bring a lamp home and put it under a washtub or beneath the bed? Don't you put it up on a table or on the mantel? We're not keeping secrets, we're telling them; we're not hiding things, we're bringing them out into the open."

In encouraging him I said this about the mismanagement and corruption, "I guess its part of human nature and God calls us in Mark 4:22 to be the revealers of such atrocities not by seeking them out but by shining our light in dark places." It just rings so true in my heart now that its what God calls us to be. He doesn't say we are 'the army' of the world, or even 'the healers' of the world. He calls us the 'salt' and the 'light' of the world, amazing properties about these two things is that their impact is not really in their intensity but their inability to go unnoticed. A small pen light in the middle of the jungle in complete darkness can be seen from a mile away. Just thinking to myself now that, that's must have been one of the reason's demon's feared Jesus, because He was able to reveal them.

I believe as bearers of the good news that is what we must be, Light. We need shine the light of Jesus in our conduct, in the way we deal with our colleagues and school mate we don't quite get along with. We need to be light so that atrocities and misdeeds have no place to hide. Let's be bearer's of the gospel because that is the source of light.

love, peace and happiness

Tau

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Honour.... A product of Love...

Its a happy new year to everyone as this is my first post since the turn of the season. Its been a very interesting year so far and been feeling a lot of lessons being learned. I remember waking up Monday morning so mad. All the brooding thoughts for the past two months began to unravel as a story in my mind. I remembered it as if it was yesterday. This all began in the middle of December last year, having to find out that information about myself I had shared in confidence had found itself into the public domain sort of hits your trust meter. You realise how easy it was to dishonour and be dishonoured with just a few words shared. To top it all off my parents surprised me with a birthday party, the 1st I can actually remember, but finding out a few days after the event that a lot of my friends had RSVPd but most didn't come. One of those huge blows to my friendship meter. Then early February 2012 I think I get this whole communication principle on lockdown only to realise I had been speaking to myself with mates nodding their head but shaking their hearts. A really tough pill to swallow, I don't want to downplay it at all. I was really gutted. I still am in a sense, but really finding solace in what God says about this.

I took a shower that Monday morning and my mind got drawn to the story of Peter. The guy Jesus said he would build His church on (Matthew 16:18). And some time after that Peter denied Jusus three times. And the time after Jesus's death and the disciples go into hiding and are afraid (John 20:19). Or when Thomas after hearing from his fellow disciples that Jesus had risen he still did not believe. I don't know about you but at this point if I were Jesus I would have been gutted. And yet being the Son of God He knew what was  to come. He knew about Peter's betrayal, but still considered him a friend and a rock on which His church would be built. I have come to realise more and more is that Jesus honoured his disciples because he loved them. He even states that they should love one another and this how people will know they are His disciples (John 13:34-35). So by this time I am almost ready to head out to class and a lot of things got put into perspective. My mates never meant to divulge privileged information, some things just slip as we have all been guilty off. My party was on the 24th of December when most people have gone on holiday or away to their extended family and finally my fellow leaders only expressed what was in their heart. Not in an effort to dishonour or undermine but to communicate something they may not have thought of til that moment. I know it may seem easy to make excuses for people but its more of seeing the best in people. Letting the love you have for them allow you to honour them even in cases when you feel they do not deserve honour.

I believe that's what honour is, a product of love one of the sums I spoke about in my last post for 2011.

love, peace and happiness

Tau

Friday, December 30, 2011

Final thoughts 2011

Love is a sum of actions and emotion that in the end exude the very thing that we find at the cross. Salvation

love, peace and happiness

Tau

Friday, November 4, 2011

Song time....

So I'm walking past OLS9 and hear a couple of GodFirst girls practising Salvation Song and  just started thinking of some of the other songs God has laid on my heart for the past couple of years. So I am on my way to the library and start singing to myself a song I wrote a couple of weeks ago called Lover of my soul. I guess for me it began as a chord progression and then started thinking about grace and how much we need it. But we can never fully realise the full extent of our sin. Just remember a mate of mine Dan Plagerson just telling me that sometimes we take people before the cross without them first realising what exactly they are being saved from. So this song came about which just highlights stuff in my life that God saved me from, and some stuff some biblical characaters went through. But I need you help, yes YOU reading this right now. Would be great if anyone who reads this can share with me one aspect of their life that they felt was  something God saved them from. Thanks a lot, here's what I've got so far:

I am a prisoner in my own world
Won't you come and set me free
I am an orphan without a home
Won't you come and love me

Lover of my soul
Lover of my soul

I am a wanderer with no place to go
Won't  you come and rescue me

love, peace and happiness

Tau